Fear of Punishment: Tracking and Healing its Source
Shamanism holds the belief that our energy body contains an archive of all of our personal and ancestral memories, of all early-life trauma, and even experiences from former lifetimes. This information is stored as “imprints” that when activated can influence our thoughts and behaviors even pulling us into experiences that repeat their stories.
Andrea (not her real name) is a client who had struggled for much of her life with a feeling and core belief that there was “something inherently wrong” with her and that she was “bad.” Subsequent to that belief was a fear that she would be punished and even deserved to be punished if she didn’t please people or do what they wanted or expected her to do. This caused Andrea to do things she didn’t want to do. Andrea also found herself afraid to speak up, afraid to share her truth, her personal experiences and perceptions if she sensed that they would not be accepted by the other person or she would be criticized by the other person. We agreed to do energy work on this pattern of fear of punishment.
Per protocol from my training in Energy Medicine through the Four Winds and the Healing the Light Body School, I had Andrea choose a stone from my Mesa and blow this pattern into the stone. I opened sacred space. As I was opening sacred space I was suddenly aware that two female beings had shown up and were standing beside the massage table on which Andrea was lying. I recognized them as the client from two previous lifetimes that I had met in previous work. I just noted this, wondering why they had showed up, and I began the Illumination Ceremony.*
I checked the chakras and identified that charkas 3, 5 and 6 were affected by this pattern of fearing and deserving punishment. I opened the 3rd chakra and laid the stone on the body at the 3rd chakra. I asked Andrea to focus on this pattern and to notice what came to her. I invited her to breathe into whatever came to her—thoughts, feelings, memories, images, etc. and to exhale, placing her intention on releasing it, untangling from it while I backwashed and cleared the chakra. As I cleared the chakra I was more and more aware of the two beings standing beside the table.
As mentioned above I recognized these two beings from previous work with Andrea. In that work we were working on the client’s consistent and persistent belief and feeling that there was something wrong with her, that she was “bad.” In that work I was taken to two previous lifetimes. In both these lifetimes, Andrea had been part of a group of “curanderas,” women who were healers, using plants, herbs and various “potions” to heal people. In one of the lifetimes this group was chased through a woods and Andrea was caught, judged to be a “witch” and burned at the stake as a witch and sorcerer. In the other life time she was hanged in the public square to “stamp out witchcraft.” In both these sessions I cleared the imprints of these lifetimes from the energy body and also cleared the “rope imprint from around Andrea’s neck.” Interestingly, Andrea reported that she had suffered from throat problems throughout her life, often feeling blocked at her throat, unable to speak her truth or coughing and choking at times. She would often have coughing spells during our energy sessions.
Since these two beings showed up at this time in response to the focus of our work, I assumed they were somehow related to this pattern and perhaps needed help of some kind. I summoned my guide, Huascar, and sought his guidance. Huascar told me that they were both here for healing. That the one on the right needed a soul retrieval and that he would do that. I saw Huascar doing healing work on this woman. I am told by Huascar that the other woman needed my help. I tracked that she was attached to Andrea in some way and was the source of much of her feelings of fearing and deserving punishment—that she was carrying both the judgment of the community in which she had lived that she was evil because of the healing work that she did in that lifetime and the belief that she “deserved to be punished” which had become imprinted at the hanging.
Psychotherapist and shamanic practitioner, Ann Drake, in her book, Healing of the Soul: Psyche and Shamanism, says the dreambody or energy body contains threads that connect us to our various past lives. Ann says that many times people have experiences that awaken them to feelings, smells, and experiences that happened long ago. Sometimes images from these lives intermingle with current reality and blur a person’s understanding of what is occurring in this life. Ann says that she has found sometimes clients’ ‘delusional’ accounts are actually past life experiences that match the traumatic experience that they had in those past lives. This material bleeds through into current life. According to Ann, “on a soul or energy essence level these past life experiences are as important to heal and bring back as current experiences of soul loss.”
I track that this soul needs healing and help in crossing over so that she can return home and continue on her path. I was instructed that I was to do this work and that Andrea was to serve as her surrogate. I explained this to the Andres and asked if she felt ok being a surrogate for this soul. Andrea agreed. I then explained this to the woman and brought her energy and gently laid it over the Andrea. I tracked the need to do an Illumination for this pattern that this soul part was carrying and was instructed to clear all the chakras. I completed the Illumination and then was instructed to complete the Death Rites and Death Spiral per protocol. I then summoned the spirit guides to accompany this soul part onto the next part of her journey. I rattled over the client assisting this energy to move on. Her spirit guides came, and I saw this energy go up and through a portal. I looked over and saw that Huascar had finished the healing work with the other being. and she was no longer there. Both were gone. There was a sense of peace and completion.
I had Andrea focus once again on the pattern of “punishment” and did some final clearing to make sure that we had cleared out any affinity or attraction to this pattern. Andrea appeared relaxed. I tracked the energy body and noticed a sense of harmony and peace. Andrea reported that she felt “good.” I illuminated the 3rd chakra and checked all chakras. They were all spinning clockwise, strong and even. I closed sacred space.
In this work I learned that this client’s pattern of fearing or deserving punishment was related to two previous lifetimes, one which was still attached to the client and was the source of her feelings of being judged as bad and deserving punishment. This previous lifetime experience was bleeding through into this lifetime, influencing the client’s current beliefs and feelings about herself.
Drake says that in her experience she finds that soul parts or soul fragments that have left the normal operating range of the body because of some trauma or terrifying event will take up residence in the outer edges of the dreambody on different frequency waves. A question that is often asked me is “where do these dissociated parts or soul parts go or live? My answer has been typically been “from the point of view of psychology they have retreated into the unconscious and from the point of view of shamanism they live in what is called non-ordinary reality or some altered state of awareness.” Ann Drake’s work causes me to wonder if these two forms that embodied the client’s past lives were living in outer edges of the Luminous Energy Field or dreambody. Ultimately it probably doesn’t matter where they reside. What is important is to track what is needed and to assist the parts in what they need.
Another question to ponder and answer is whether these two energy beings are parts of the client that need to be brought back and returned to the body as in a soul retrieval, or whether they are actually deceased and need assistance in crossing over. As I pondered this question I was told that they are the client’s previous lives. Both are dead but have not yet crossed over due to the tragic forms of their deaths. They have been traveling with the client. Dr. Joe Mancini in his article “Comparing Shamanism with Past-Life Regression” says in his post in 7th Wave says that although the current person has lived before as these various personalities because they all share the same soul; nevertheless, it is also true, paradoxically, that each personality is also distinctive from the others and on its own journey. Therefore, it would seem appropriate, as I was directed, that I assist this soul to cross over. Andrea reported that the weeks following this work she felt deeply loved in a way that she hadn't before.
Sources:
Drake, Ann, PsyD. Healing of the Soul: Psyche and Shamanism
Mancini, Joe, PhD. “Comparing Shamanism with Past-Life Regression.” Posted on Sep 23, 2013 in 7th Wave, retrieved 1-7-18.
Villolodo, Albert. Shaman, Healer, Sage.
*An Illumination is a process where the shaman clears various energetic imprints from a person’s chakras and then transmits energy that does not contain the imprint to the chakra.